Alternative Career Brainstorming

[fivestarday]

Let's see. What's a job or career choice that allows me to stay in my house most of the day, care for my children, and in general run things exactly how I want within reason?

LOL

I don't think there is one. Oh well.

[Blackcat31]

Child care.

[fivestarday]

haha Ding ding ding! You win! lol

[Annalee]

YES, Child Care! Every time I entertain thoughts of quitting, the travel and working for someone thoughts send me right back to MY OWN child care program to be MY OWN BOSS.

[fivestarday]

Right? But i jUsT cAnT tAke iT aNyMoREEEE!
The stinky poops,
the mess,
the "i'm hungry" (after I just fed the child 15 minutes ago)
the crying,
the nap wailing,
the never-getting-to-leave-my-house
the parent who says, "i had the day off today! did you have a good day, dck?"
the poor pay
THE SNOT
the mess
the "oh, she does have a runny nose, doesn't she?" YES SHE DOES AND SHE DID! lol
the lack of privacy
and did I mention the mess?

[Blackcat31]

Right? But i jUsT cAnT tAke iT aNyMoREEEE!
The stinky poops,
the mess,
the "i'm hungry" (after I just fed the child 15 minutes ago)
the crying,
the nap wailing,
the never-getting-to-leave-my-house
the parent who says, "i had the day off today! did you have a good day, dck?"
the poor pay
THE SNOT
the mess
the "oh, she does have a runny nose, doesn't she?" YES SHE DOES AND SHE DID! lol
the lack of privacy
and did I mention the mess?

I agree with all of the above but the secret is YOU (as the business owner) have the ability to control all of those issues.
Other than the stinky poo... I haven't figured that one out yet. lol!

[fivestarday]

I've proven to myself beyond all scientific and or spiritual doubt that I am in fact not capable of controlling those issues, even though, yes, they are within my control alone. LOL

I've had some poop stink waft up into my mouth and settle on my tongue. I've had to get a glass of water to make the smell go away. What the heck is up with these diapers??

[Annalee]

YES, Child Care! Every time I entertain thoughts of quitting, the travel and working for someone thoughts send me right back to MY OWN child care program to be MY OWN BOSS.

[fivestarday]

I am glad it is an option! Doesn't it feel amazing to create something? That's how I felt when I got back into this. Working for corporations is the absolute worst, in my opinon.

[SandBox]

The snot does suck. 🤢 one of my least favorite parts and the poop. Crappy parents come 3rd. More good than not, but still. When you have to deal with them it’s just like dealing with an adult toddler. I only have room for child toddlers. 🤣

[fivestarday]

People are just so odd. I've encountered some very strange ones. Memorable!

[Pestle]

After expenses, including property taxes and wear and tear on your home, how much are you making at the end of the year?

Could you work out a childcare swap and work part time outside of your home?

I am looking ahead to seventh grade, which we have no good plans for at the moment. With my kid's ADHD, she needs an adult fully present and attentive in order to accomplish her schoolwork. I want her to be independent, but I have to accept that the condition slows down the process of cognitive development, especially impulse control, and she is not going to have the self-discipline I did at her age to be homeschooled with a parent who is working full-time. The non-traditional high schools in the region have a hefty price tag and are too far away for us to manage transportation as long as I am working in childcare. I'm currently mulling over the idea of working part time and homeschooling once she reaches that age.

I like kids. I don't care about the poop. I'm not triggered by screaming. And I've dealt with enough adults in my other careers to be comfortable getting up in their faces and laying down the law. As I explain to people when I tell them what my job is, "I'd rather deal with poop than email." Very rarely has anyone told me that they feel differently.

So that's me. I understand myself, and I'm comfortable doing this job. You understand yourself, and you're not comfortable doing this job. You are going to have to figure out which compromises to make--income, presence at home, control over the daily comings and goings. Right now, my compromises meet my needs, but in the future, they won't, and I'm going to have to figure out different compromises. To correct Mick Jagger, you can't ever get what you want.

[fivestarday]

That's very true that the compromises meet needs, but the needs change. Nothing ever stays the same. I used to greatly enjoy this, but I simply don't anymore.

I make $10 per day per child. After food and wear and tear, I probably only make $5-7 per day per child. I watch 4 children total, 8 hours a day. I used to be 10 hours, but I stopped doing that! So about $6 X 20 days a month=$120 X 4 kids = $480 a month after expenses. This is the going rate for in home childcare in my area.

Here is where I am lucky and why I can quit.

I make more than double that $480 fulfilling the job of wife, mother, and landlord. My small share of our home's income, which 40% of which is supplemented from a room we rent out (my idea!), is more than what I make working childcare in or outside the home. I used to have to discuss nearly every purchase with my husband because he was the earner and I was in charge of our children. But one day I told him enough was enough and I deserved to have access to my own dependable amount of money to spend how I see fit. And not pennies either. A decent amount to improve our day-to-day life, rather than constantly seeing him reinvest thousands in his businesses. It was money I earned caring for our children and caring for our home. It's demoralizing to always have to ask for money and convince someone of the need of the purchase. I felt like a teenager with her hand out, rather than a wife. I got my wish.

I use my budget to buy clothes and toys for my kids, groceries, date nights, and things to make our home more comfortable, like furniture. We may not always have a renter, and losing the renter would mean a large hit to my income. But we have one for now. So I hope to take this little bit of extra and build with it, rather than squander it on things that do not have potential for a return. I cut my own hair, never visit a salon, and the only makeup I buy is sunscreen. All of my clothing is second-hand. I wish i could take those small sacrifices and use them to build something neat. But what?

[Momboss]

My order of worst parts of this job:
1- Poop
2- Screaming/crying nonstop
3- weird parents
4- cleaning up after illness or potty accidents
5- licensing regs
6- that isolating feeling of not being around other adults
7- enforcing policies- theres no “higher up” to blame lol

[fivestarday]

I'm glad to see the screaming and crying is your number 2. Just yesterday I had a child wailing for 15-20 minutes. I held her, comforted her, fed her. As soon as I set her down, it started again. She was sobbing. It was so sad. Gives me a stomach ache when I cannot "fix" what's wrong. I hate to see kids so sad. And that's what she was, just plain sad and ready to be done here.

[Cat Herder]

I have not come up with a better plan to meet my personal goals. "Wife" and "Mother" were always more important to me than "employee.

I am sure there is some creepy online video job where I tell grown people what to do all day out there.... but..... eww.

I'll stick to my day job.

[Annalee]

TRUE statement!

[fivestarday]

I have not come up with a better plan to meet my personal goals. "Wife" and "Mother" were always more important to me than "employee.

I am sure there is some creepy online video job where I tell grown people what to do all day out there.... but..... eww.

I'll stick to my day job.

Creepy online video job...that made me laugh! Yep, wife and mother are extremely important. Culture creators.

[SandBox]

So are you truly quitting? I’ve thought about it lots. But then I just termed my latest problem
family and now I am okay again. 🤣🤣🤣 Funny how that works.

I had a nice quiet office job with cool bosses before this. Working for others never bothered me as long as I am not micromanaged. Which I normally wasn’t. I hope you find something you love. Or at least like.

[fivestarday]

Thank you! hahaha yes, problem families. You never knew how relieved you would be for them to be gone, until they are GONE.

Yes, I am truly quitting. Tomorrow is the last day for my last kid here. I have been over it since probably sixty days ago. I am miserable. But I won't be Saturday! It is so challenging to find something I can do that I love that is profitable. I have great love for many kinds of art and I practice them, but even to practice something I love takes time. On a good day, my husband is empathetic to the never-endingness of caring for our children, and gives me a couple of hours during the evening to do something productive. On a bad day, he says when I complain, "You chose to have children. Deal with it." I've tried taking classes, creating and selling art, volunteer work. My time always seems to get gobbled up by my kids or when I do have time scheduled for myself and even when I did have a job outside the home, my husband would volunteer the time so I could go to a class, work, or create. But his committment would last a week or maybe a month, and then some big work project would pull him away. To him, it just didn't make sense financially because he earns more per hour.

I'm trying to turn myself into less of a complainer and more of a do-er. Part of that must involve me carving out a physical and time space for myself to practice art or build something --anything--that belongs to me and me alone. To me that's a gift I can give my kids someday. Look what mom was able to do, you can do neat things too.

[SandBox]

I’m trying to reply to your reply, I think I’m going it right? Hopefully this shows up below yours.

Well congrats then that you’re done and you’re happy about it!
Taking care of kids is hard work. We need other outlets. I like to do artsy type stuff, but not enough to sell anything.

[GirlMomma]

fivestarday

“I make $10 per day per child. After food and wear and tear, I probably only make $5-7 per day per child. I watch 4 children total, 8 hours a day. I used to be 10 hours, but I stopped doing that! So about $6 X 20 days a month=$120 X 4 kids = $480 a month after expenses. This is the going rate for in home childcare in my area.”

I am in Indiana, too and you’re not charging enough as a legally unlicensed home childcare provider. Don’t sell yourself short.

I didn’t care what home providers were charging in my area. Most of those providers are paid under the table (so they don’t pay taxes) and are found via word of mouth. I called around to centers and registered providers. The average at the time was $115/week for a toddler.

I knew I would provide a premium service so I charged a higher rate of $125/week. Two years later, my current families pay $135 and my rate for new enrollees is $145. This is paid regardless of the child’s attendance and hours. Absolutely no part time rates or per day rates and no infants.

My husband and I are able to live off of the funds I bring in with my daycare. The money he brings in goes into savings/investments/spending. I am hyper independent. While most days I’d love to be a full time SAHM, I simply can’t allow my husband to support me (no shame to anyone who does!) While we have a very strong marriage, I want to be sure that if we split tomorrow or (Heaven forbid) something happened to him, I could still maintain our financial obligations for myself and our girls to give them stability.

[fivestarday]

That's very smart of you to secure that stability for you and your family. I applaud you on that. I am selling myself short, but I tried higher prices at first. I advertised for $35 a day rates and never got any interest, except for one father who left his son here for 12 hours, sometimes 13 hours. I dropped it to $30, then $25 and nope. No interest. It wasn't until I significantly dropped my rates that I had enough kids to really call this a business. I know of places in this town who charge what equates to $1 an hour. I've seen pictures of their "operation" with 12, 15 kids with an infant or two thrown in the mix for fun I suppose? Parents are so cheap.

Honestly, as a full-time SAHM I just can't handle the days anymore with added children beyond my own. It's depressing enough being swallowed up by everyone else's needs. I love my children so much and I feel endlessly lucky to be here with them, but so far motherhood has been incredibly isolating. It's like I don't even exist anymore. I'm just a roomba robot picking up things off the floor.

I'm having a difficult day. Most days I feel better than this. I feel like a more advanced robot. LOL

[Pestle]

I live in Tennessee and I'm charging over $30 a day and about to raise my rates again. I'm in a city, and providing meals and diapers, but is the cost of living and housing here three times what it is where you live? If not, your number should be closer to mine. You haven't priced the unengaged families out.

[GirlMomma]

Love the “priced the unengaged families out” - that is so true!!

[fivestarday]

It may be. Average rent around here is only $800 for a 2 bedroom house.

[Pestle]

Average rent around here is not $2400; it's $1200, which is 150% of where you're at. The cost of living in my city is lower than the national average, apparently.

When you first opened, nobody had reason to pay you a competitive rate. You were an unknown quantity. Lots of people weren't willing to take a risk on you. It was the same with me. But most of those first clients I had weren't great to work with. They were, after all, the people who were looking for the cheapest possible care without regard for where it was coming from.

Is there not a childcare shortage where you are? The hospital daycare here in town has an admissions freeze, because they have lost so much staff. They have families with kids in care whose siblings were promised a space, and there are no spaces available. I have been taking so many calls, text messages, emails, Facebook messages looking for infant care. Everybody decided the pandemic was a great time to make a baby.

[fivestarday]

If there is a childcare shortage, I have not noticed it. I have never had trouble enrolling my son in care, or switching him to a new program. I also see many people advertise that "due to the pandemic, they are now being a SAHM and interested in babysitting". Yes, that word. Babysitting. In fact, I actually left a local childcare FB group because it made me annoyed to see just how many people were flooding the market. They offered their care at incredibly low prices, too. Like $2-3 a day.