Two-parter: DCK's Photos and Nap Time

[DeeDee]

Had a Secret Santa Gift Exchange/Party for the daycare kiddos today. Shortly after picking up DCP (A) texts no Secret Santa pictures. Then another DCP (B) also asked the same thing, saying they couldn't wait to see "a" picture and they'd been looking out all day

Granted I count myself lucky to have the DCP's I have. And I know they didn't mean any harm and just wanted to see pics of their little ones. But it definitely felt like entitlement, and that expectations were put on me to produce pictures the day of. When we've had parties in the past I'd send a picture or two during nap, if I had the time and energy. I was able to do that a lot more last year as I had a much older group.

DCP (B) started with me last year so I think she's expecting the same thing, there's been a few times that she's said something similar. Instead of replying to both DCP's I just sent out a group message thanking everyone for bringing gifts, letting them know the kids had fun, there were a lot of photos and that they'd get them when I had chance to look them through. I use to send photos more often last year but this year I send when/if I can but it's just randomly to not allow anyone to expect it. But not looking like that did anything 🙃
How would you nip this in the bud?


...
Got a text tonight at 11:19pm, from a DCD saying please don't let DCB take naps late in the afternoon going forward... can you please make DCB nap around 11:00am ? DCB wants to go to sleep pass midnight.

Our nap time is from 1:15-3:15pm, so not sure what DCD means by late. I mean NO to the earlier nap time. But I'm drawing a blank on what to tell DCD. Just finished organizing the house for our Christmas Dinner with family. It's been a long day, not many brain cells left

[Annalee]

Had a Secret Santa Gift Exchange/Party for the daycare kiddos today. Shortly after picking up DCP (A) texts no Secret Santa pictures. Then another DCP (B) also asked the same thing, saying they couldn't wait to see "a" picture and they'd been looking out all day

Granted I count myself lucky to have the DCP's I have. And I know they didn't mean any harm and just wanted to see pics of their little ones. But it definitely felt like entitlement, and that expectations were put on me to produce pictures the day of. When we've had parties in the past I'd send a picture or two during nap, if I had the time and energy. I was able to do that a lot more last year as I had a much older group.

DCP (B) started with me last year so I think she's expecting the same thing, there's been a few times that she's said something similar. Instead of replying to both DCP's I just sent out a group message thanking everyone for bringing gifts, letting them know the kids had fun, there were a lot of photos and that they'd get them when I had chance to look them through. I use to send photos more often last year but this year I send when/if I can but it's just randomly to not allow anyone to expect it. But not looking like that did anything 🙃
How would you nip this in the bud?


...
Got a text tonight at 11:19pm, from a DCD saying please don't let DCB take naps late in the afternoon going forward... can you please make DCB nap around 11:00am ? DCB wants to go to sleep pass midnight.

Our nap time is from 1:15-3:15pm, so not sure what DCD means by late. I mean NO to the earlier nap time. But I'm drawing a blank on what to tell DCD. Just finished organizing the house for our Christmas Dinner with family. It's been a long day, not many brain cells left

I think I would send out a group text (but I send those text separately so they can't feed off each other) something like "Child Care Info.......the kiddos had a wonderful time today and it was very busy thus I got caught up in the HOLIDAY FUN so I missed the pics opportunity; also a friendly reminder....naptime is 1:15-3:15 every day. Happy Holidays!" I like to always begin with CHILD CARE UPDATE, then they KNOW that ALL got the text and the ones the text is REALLY FOR hopefully feel silly for their petty complaints but sadly , usually the good ones text thinking they did something wrong

[flyingjewels]

I would tell him: “Nap time is 1:15 to 3:15 and I can’t make special accommodations for one child with nap time. Those are standard nap times for daycares and what I have always done. If he is not going to bed past midnight, I don’t think my nap times are what is causing that.” If he wants to press more and is being nice, I may offer suggestions at an appropriate time or when I felt like it. And I’d maybe let him know what type of napper is he especially if the child doesn’t even sleep the entire time or wakes earlier than 3:15, I’d let him know to further solidify it isn’t because of nap times.

Some kids are night owls or parents are allowing screens too late or sugar or the child needs to see an ENT. Like it’s a slew of reasons that it could be. But that’s their issue to figure out, but I offer suggestions to nice people that want it.

[DeeDee]

I think I would send out a group text (but I send those text separately so they can't feed off each other) something like "Child Care Info.......the kiddos had a wonderful time today and it was very busy thus I got caught up in the HOLIDAY FUN so I missed the pics opportunity; also a friendly reminder....naptime is 1:15-3:15 every day. Happy Holidays!" I like to always begin with CHILD CARE UPDATE, then they KNOW that ALL got the text and the ones the text is REALLY FOR hopefully feel silly for their petty complaints but sadly , usually the good ones text thinking they did something wrong

Absolutely agree with that Annalee. I had a similar heading and sent it to everyone before anyone else asked the same ?

It was through Brightwheel, so no worries about them feeding off each other. But I know what you mean. So true the ones it's really for most times it goes over their heads or they ignore it, smh.

I'll have to send another message now, lol. And here I was thinking my last day for the year would be simple and over by 6pm.

[DeeDee]

I would tell him: “Nap time is 1:15 to 3:15 and I can’t make special accommodations for one child with nap time. Those are standard nap times for daycares and what I have always done. If he is not going to bed past midnight, I don’t think my nap times are what is causing that.” If he wants to press more and is being nice, I may offer suggestions at an appropriate time or when I felt like it. And I’d maybe let him know what type of napper is he especially if the child doesn’t even sleep the entire time or wakes earlier than 3:15, I’d let him know to further solidify it isn’t because of nap times.

Some kids are night owls or parents are allowing screens too late or sugar or the child needs to see an ENT. Like it’s a slew of reasons that it could be. But that’s their issue to figure out, but I offer suggestions to nice people that want it.

I'll use the first sentence and let him know I can't do special. This DCD is the one who will make a mountain out of a molehill, so best to keep it simple.

You make a great point, I know it's definitely due to screens and sugar. DCB's older brother was previously in my care and would show up every morning at drop off with a cellphone and a tablet in hand. And DCD has made comments that DCB (current) is always watching television at home. When he arrives I the mornings his tongue is always candy colored and it took DCB a good 2.5 months before he would drink milk or water

[Annalee]

If they keep pressing the issue ask "if this is their two weeks notice"....that usually shuts them up.

[DeeDee]

Oh I know that'll make be quiet. There are no open spots in my area so parents are not trying to lose their daycare spot.

Plus all my DCP's are satisfied with my program and are always commenting on how well I run my program especially with it just being me. But some will still try to find things to nitpick. Sometimes I think they don't know how good they got it. Lol

[DeeDee]

*woops meant to comment

[Sahm121]

The picture comment would bug me too, but then I’d let it go because I know they’re excited about the things I do at daycare. I had 2 activities this week that I didn’t get to take pictures of because it was so hectic and I just posted a picture of the kids when it was done and said something like ‘sometimes making memories means we can’t capture a ton of pictures!’

[Sahm121]

The 11:19pm text would really piss me off. I’d respond the next day with a reminder to not text after hours and then I’d pretend I was confused and say I don’t understand what you’re asking for. Our nap time is from 1:15-3:15 and this is group care, I’m not sure if you’re saying you’re withdrawing from care since it would be impossible to have dcb on a different schedule than anyone else

[GirlMomma]

I second this!

[littlefriends]

This is how I would handle it as well!

[Annalee]

I think brightwheel was mentioned in this post; my center friend said her that since her director had implemented bright wheel the parents drive them crazy wanting photos at the most inopportune times.....she said her director just don't get how time-consuming that can be?

[e.j.]

When I get texts asking for pictures and I don't have the time to send something, I just quickly explain, "It's been so busy today that I haven't had a chance. Will try to send you a pic when I have a minute." or I explain that "I was so busy, I didn't have the chance to take any pics but dcb/dcg had a great time!"

Requesting a change in nap schedule isn't an emergency so if I got a text from dcd at that hour of the night, I'd ignore it. In the morning, I'd let him know I got the text but didn't respond because of the late hour. I'd then explain that my nap time is scheduled when it is because it works best for me and for most of the kids in care. I'd explain that napping dcb earlier than everyone else would present a problem for everyone. His child probably wouldn't nap because the rest of the kids would be making too much noise as they continued to play. If dcb managed to fall asleep at 11:00, he would be wide awake at 1:15 when the other kids were ready for their naps. It would be nearly impossible to keep him quiet enough for the others to sleep and in trying to keep him busy and quiet, I wouldn't be able to clean up after lunch and complete the paperwork I need to do during that time. I'd explain that if my regular nap time didn't work for him, I would totally understand if he needed to find another dc provider who offered a nap schedule that worked better for him, and I'd remind him he would need to give me a 2-week notice.

[Cat Herder]

I used the "It is cold, flu, and RSV season, along with the Christmas Holidays. I will make an effort to take pictures when my hands can stay dry for more than 4 minutes from washing. Between runny noses, diaper changes, food prep, serving & cleaning up meals, cleaning toys & surfaces, plus actively assisting holiday crafts, I am simply too overtasked with basic child care needs to provide the complementary services of adult interaction at this time. Thanks in advance for your understanding."