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**Annalee** · 02-02-2023, 03:31 PM

Originally posted by Sahm121 View Post

Just too many things going on personally at the same time and I can’t seem to reignite my passion for childcare. Send me thoughts and ideas please -
daycare is going great. Starting one Monday that gets me back to full. All good kids and everyone gone thar needed to go. I just can’t seem to get out of my funk and apparently my assistant noticed because she told me to take tomorrow mornin off (small group tomorrow). I didn’t realize the funk was noticeable

to you! I'm on a roller coaster ride with emotions still but much better for 2022...2020-21 'bout got me! Sharing some things I did....maybe something a little helpful for you.....I began putting ME into the equation i.e. bought shoes where my feet don't hurt, started having mani and pedi, see the chiro/massage biweekly, etc. I had NEVER done any of these before I made a self-care regimen.

I also had after hours meetings with my ccrr coach as my mind didn't work too well at getting things together...I had ideas and the stuff, just couldn't think clearly....made post-it notes so I had things to work on when she came.....curriculum, displays, play centers or just talking/sharing/therapy!

I TRY to STAY OFF my computer in the evening.....some days work good at that, some days NOT.

I go to the gym at 4:30 each morning.

Just crazy things I'm sure but these do help me!

I've read my bible through in 2022 and have started again for 2023.

2023 is moving along, I have bad moments but not continuous days of bad moments.....

**GirlMomma** · 02-02-2023, 04:41 PM

You’re not alone.

Frankly, if the two kids I started in January (one is being termed) are any indication on the new parenting style, I’m done.

The boy I am terming screamed all morning because he wasn't getting an adequate amount of sleep and has a very poor diet. There is no routine/structure at home.

The girl I enrolled also doesn’t have any structure at home so when she’s redirected here, she will give me that spoiled, bratty shrill. Her mother says she “autistic.” She most certainly isn’t!! She’s just not disciplined!

Sorry to hijack your post, I am just feeling the same way.

**Annalee** · 02-02-2023, 05:04 PM

Girlmomma and SAHM, I am a long timer and come from a time when 'things' were different, maybe even more bearable however, times are so different causing frustration now more than ever. I have had to get out of my own comfort zone and TRY to curb some social-emotional issues within the kids so I don't go nuts....there are lots of terms to use but self-regulating covers the vast majority of it...so I'm working to create some 'safe zones' for one child at a time therefore I'm making multiples of these.....also I want to add personally, there are some significant issues going on as well for me.....I think child care providers are a unique brand of people and we love/care deeply in every aspect of our life.

I'm a server but the time has come to protect ME....not to forsake others but to place ME in these personal and professional equations. Does any of this make sense?

Consider doing this for yourselves!

**Sahm121** · 02-02-2023, 05:59 PM

Originally posted by Annalee View Post

Girlmomma and SAHM, I am a long timer and come from a time when 'things' were different, maybe even more bearable however, times are so different causing frustration now more than ever. I have had to get out of my own comfort zone and TRY to curb some social-emotional issues within the kids so I don't go nuts....there are lots of terms to use but self-regulating covers the vast majority of it...so I'm working to create some 'safe zones' for one child at a time therefore I'm making multiples of these.....also I want to add personally, there are some significant issues going on as well for me.....I think child care providers are a unique brand of people and we love/care deeply in every aspect of our life.

I'm a server but the time has come to protect ME....not to forsake others but to place ME in these personal and professional equations. Does any of this make sense?

Consider doing this for yourselves!

I increased paid days this year and managed one day off a month 😁. But I had a training last month that day and a training this month… next month it’s a true Day off and thank God cause I am already tired for next month. Urghh
I just feel like I’m stuck in a gray cloud

**Annalee** · 02-03-2023, 06:02 AM

SAHM, something else I've done which is very difficult for me as I am TYPE A-proactive-get-it-done-now.....regarding the two issues impacting me/my family personally right now......when others call/text/visit, if I can't, I tell them I CAN NOT discuss that right now/today/etc. and then I will at another time when I'm emotionally/mentally/have time ready I will set up a time/contact them....This used to make them angry cause I have always been the forerunner but I just have to say NO sometimes. One of these issues involves a lawyer and a court date so they work around me now.....just like in daycare "if someone wants your services they will make it work". I can't believe I'm even saying some of this stuff but it is where my life is now!

**GirlMomma** · 02-03-2023, 06:45 AM

Annalee I am the same type-A personality. This year, I have started being a more “selfish” with my business so that works for me and not others. For example, I am taking every federal holiday off, I shortened my hours and I transitioned to a 52 week paid program.

Two families left at the end of 2022. Both of which were my worst families. They didn’t like the changes I was implementing for 2023 so they left to find a provider that worked better for them. I felt it was a win and I thought 2023 was going to be great! I filled the two spots within a week. But these two new families have shown me there is a huge shift in parenting styles.

Even though these parents are my age, they’re literally flying by the seat of their pants (as someone else on here always says!) to raise their kids. There is no respect for me, my time or my policies. There is no discipline at home. There is no structure at home. I’m convinced the only time these kids see a vegetable and a cup of water/white milk is at daycare. These parents are self diagnosing their kids with Autism/Aspergers the second the kid doesn’t hit a milestone, like talking. They’d rather Google answers instead of reading a book or simply talking to their child.

I know a lot of the vets here have experienced this shift already and have dealt with these very same issues. I have too, but not all at the same time, if that makes sense?

Perhaps I set my expectations a little too high for 2023 and I’m getting a reality check now? 😂 I don’t know. I am hopeful this isn’t the new “norm” and I can make it a few more years.

**GirlMomma** · 02-03-2023, 07:07 AM

Originally posted by Sahm121 View Post

I increased paid days this year and managed one day off a month 😁. But I had a training last month that day and a training this month… next month it’s a true Day off and thank God cause I am already tired for next month. Urghh
I just feel like I’m stuck in a gray cloud

I have done the same things, SAHM. We’re on the right track. I think we should start reminding ourselves that we’re not even six weeks into the New Year and we won’t see the positive results to the changes we’ve made overnight. Good things take time.

**Annalee** · 02-03-2023, 07:37 AM

I've been using some free resources on https://consciousdiscipline.com/ to help with the safe zones; awaiting some things I've ordered elsewhere so don't have it together yet but it's in the works. This is for the self-regulation issues within some of the children we are working with.

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