Backbone

[GirlMomma]

My backbone is getting stronger thanks to this forum 💪🏼

I had a family reach out for care every other week. I told them they paid for the spot, not the child’s attendance and whether the child is here or not, payment is due on the specified date. Normally, I would’ve felt bad & taken the child part time and kicked myself every other week when I didn’t get a payment for the spot.

[Cat Herder]

Awesome! Don't assume they won't take you up on it, though. Many 50/50 custody arrangements seek out this option, with each paying for their own provider. The cost is included in both parents calculations for child support, anyway. Many child support payors would much rather the money go to you and will appreciate the peace having two providers gives each parent as they move on with their lives. Privacy and confidentiality is invaluable.

[Cat Herder]

It also gives them guaranteed child care in the event the other parent flakes out on their responsibilities as often happens when they are in a new "love bubble".

[GirlMomma]

I think that’s why the dad was willing to do it 😎

[Alwaysgreener]

I am willing to do all kinds of pt but I just don't want to deal with every other week. Good luck.

[Gemma]

Congratulations on stiffening your backbone! ...and whenever that "guilty feeling" shows up, stand up and fight back

[Valerie928]

Awesome! Good for you👍😊

[GirlMomma]

Alwaysgreener is there a reason why you don’t want to do every other week? My husband thinks it could be bad too - only because he thinks I’ll be chasing payment for the weeks they’re off.

the boy is 4, he seems like he’s a typical 4YO

[Cat Herder]

You cut their enrollment the very first time they don't pay. One chance.

[GirlMomma]

I will Cat Herder

[Alwaysgreener]

Alwaysgreener is there a reason why you don’t want to do every other week? My husband thinks it could be bad too - only because he thinks I’ll be chasing payment for the weeks they’re off.

the boy is 4, he seems like he’s a typical 4YO

Some of it is the attitude that the parents give, like they want a discount or want me to be open on demand on the weeks the child doesn't come. The last time I got a call for every other week, mom needed care for 12 hours due to her commute and dad live far enough away that he was unable to get here any earlier than her.

But some of it is also having to remember which week the child is coming and not having enough food or supplies on the weeks the child comes. With my part-time kids I know that on Monday Tuesday this child's going to be here and Wednesday Thursday this child's going to be here etc so I plan accordingly.

Now with that said you'll hear over and over on this group one day a week babies don't work. But I've done one day a week babies and it works for me. I currently just had one leave he's been here for two years with his older brother Monday's only. And I currently have a Wednesday only baby that is been coming for months now. Her older brothers and coming for years but when she was born I had the one day a week Monday and another infant so she could only come on Mondays with her brother. I expect Mom to start her on Mondays once she finds out that I don't have my Monday only family anymore.

(I also don't like teachers and nurses that work 12 hours, or rotating, although I haven't tried rotating it just seems like it would be disruptive for me and stressful in the planning sense for me)

[Alwaysgreener]

Payment wise like CH says no pay no stay. Don't ever chase a payment you're not a puppy dog. I will send a reminder if they don't drop it off with the child the last day that their child comes for the week but I won't chase it.

[GirlMomma]

That makes sense, thank you!!

[Cat Herder]

"like they want a discount or want me to be open on demand on the weeks the child doesn't come."

That is how I operate. I have six paid full-time slots and operate as if all 6 kids will be here everyday. If I have extra lunch, the kids get thirds and fourths if they want. If I have extra crafts, I send them home to be completed with parents or donate them to the women's shelter at the end of the month depending on the family's choice. I have no turnover of kids to plan for and the stress level is very low this way.

I offer set hours, 10 hours per day. I will never keep a kid for 12 hours in a single day, it is not developmentally appropriate. Nurses and Teachers should know that better than anyone and as such should stagger their hours/shifts with the child other parent, grandparent, aunt/uncle or even a nanny in their own home if necessary. It isn't about the child being with another adult, it is about the child being in a group of unrelated kids for that many consecutive hours. They should be well versed in RAD, ACES and the Russian Orphan Studies. Don't let them guilt you, they know better.

[Alwaysgreener]

"like they want a discount or want me to be open on demand on the weeks the child doesn't come."

That is how I operate. I have six paid full-time slots and operate as if all 6 kids will be here everyday. If I have extra lunch, the kids get thirds and fourths if they want. If I have extra crafts, I send them home to be completed with parents or donate them to the women's shelter at the end of the month depending on the family's choice. I have no turnover of kids to plan for and the stress level is very low this way.

I offer set hours, 10 hours per day. I will never keep a kid for 12 hours in a single day, it is not developmentally appropriate. Nurses and Teachers should know that better than anyone and as such should stagger their hours/shifts with the child other parent, grandparent, aunt/uncle or even a nanny in their own home if necessary. It isn't about the child being with another adult, it is about the child being in a group of unrelated kids for that many consecutive hours. They should be well versed in RAD, ACES and the Russian Orphan Studies. Don't let them guilt you, they know better.

Yeah I can see how that would work for you.

I have contract hours and have different hours (m w 8-6 and TTh 7-5) and mostly pt kids. So on days I don't work early, I sleep in or take me time before my kids wake. The idea that I would have to be alert and waiting for a possible family would drive me nuts.


because I mostly pt kids, if I have to close for the day (last minute thing) or close early, I only contact the families that I expect in care that day. I can only imagine having said family show up on their off week or me forgetting to contact them and they show up for care. Or they forget to let me know that said child would be absent for a day and I am up waiting for them.
Honestly If I had an every other week family, I would charge a higher rate for week one and either not charge for the second week or charge a holding fee and make it clear to said family that they would have to pay the difference per day for any day that they wanted to use during the second week. (Week one and two could be equal to two normal weeks of pay or close to the same)

[Alwaysgreener]

I agree with you on the 12 hours. I have had a few tours that ended "badly" when they discovered that I cap off at ten hours. "But what if I want to... after work???" Well you take your child with you so I can spend time with my kids without yours.

[GirlMomma]

I am only open long enough for families to commute to and from. Cuts down on a lot of drama!

[Jo123abc]

Yup, my program doesn't work well for anyone working outside of my community. I simply refuse to have longer hours. I am open 7:45 to 5. If someone is working until 5 and gets here at 5 or 10 after I don't mind. If they are off at 4 and show up at 15 after I get really annoyed though. These hours work best for my family. The only way I would change it is if I switch to 4-day work weeks.

[GirlMomma]

Jo123abc I’d LOVE 4 day work weeks. I think I may consider it in the future

[GirlMomma]

I thought about lowering the tuition on their off weeks but I run a full time program.

[GirlMomma]

Thank you Gemma 😂

Alwaysgreener the mother lives 2 hours away and from the sounds of it doesn’t work at all. I don’t think that will be an issue, but if it comes up, they pay for the spot so it’s theirs 🤷🏻♀️ I’m not even going to attempt to try to find someone to fill the off weeks.

[Cat Herder]

I am ok with them coming any day M-F because they paid for it and I have already written off all food and supplies on my taxes. My husband also works from home so I am already up and have my chores done, regardless. I don't close last minute barring a true emergency, my schedule is set a year in advance. They cannot come after 9 am. If no one is here by then, my day is mine although I usually make up my hours in another way so as to not lower my time/space annual tax write off rate. Losing a few percent (child attendance hours) or meal counts (abt $13.00 per child/per day) write offs can greatly effect my income each year. I am looking at the annual fiscal picture, not the daily one. I am funding my own retirement.

[Alwaysgreener]

GirlMomma That's great it will work for you. Like I said one day a week and pt works for me but not everyone.

Cat Herder. I don't close at the last minute unless I have to, but since I have young kids I like to prepare/plan for it and like my example above, I don't want to worry about a what if when my kids need me. So for now I will opt out of bi weekly dcf.