Am I Being Too Sensitive?

[TenderHearts]

I have been doing daycare for many years. I have had really great relationships with so many of my families and most genuinely care about me and my family and ask how we are, how was your weekend ect. Now there was always that one family that never did but all in all most seemed to care. This current group I have only one family really ever asks how we are or anything. It really hurts my feelings gs that I always ask them how was your Thanksgiving ect. I have one family in particular that have been with me for a year and a half, seems last few months they do t ask much, Dad never does, he barely looks at me does a quick wave and he's getting g back into his car. Mom doesn't seem as friendly but she is pregnant and I know its been a little rough. It seems to have started a couple months ago when their daughter was sick. I ended up having to grill them to get information. I reminded them that I have to know symptoms so I can make the right decision for what to do with covid. I made them stay home longer due to her symptoms per health department and I do t think they liked that. I feel like I want to ask them if they have an issue or if I should just keep doing what I'm doing. I'm just hurt that no one seems to want to know more about me or care about my family. My husband had a heart procedure and only 2 families asked how he was doing. Am I being sensitive? My daycare parents are much younger than previous years so maybe that's it I don't know. Just frustrating all the little things I do for them and they really don't seem to care. Anyways there's my vent for the day. Sorry if a lot of misspelled words but I'm on my phone lol
thanks for listening

[Blackcat31]

I feel you! These last few years as well as currently, I've noticed this to be common. Everyone is super self-centered and even those that do ask about me/my family/day etc... really don't care and are just asking to be polite or because I did.

I don't think you are being too sensitive but I would definitely change my expectations as getting people to think beyond themselves isn't something I see changing too much. All they seem to care about is if you'll be open/closed and how much it's going to cost them. As for your family that seems upset about the COVID exclusion, I doubt it's personal TOWARDS you and more about them and having to actually take care of their own child.

I know there are many young adults out there that do genuinely care about others but truth be told, I think they are a rarity.

On that note, how is your DH doing? Hoping he is recovering well. Scary times right now so any type of medical procedure has got to be frightening.

[Annalee]

Agreed to both of the above post.....mom and I have tried to alleviate some of what makes us feel hurt/angry/frustrated. personally and professionally....I do NOT like it but it is what it is. The relationship part along with the genuine niceness is all but gone! I don't think it's covid per se as the whole cause but it seems to be a generational thing and covid just happened to be here at the time. to everyone as I think we have all had a roller coaster of emotions for a while now!

[TenderHearts]

Thank you I'm glad I'm not the only one. I do t see developing any long term relationships anymore like the past. My husband is doing ok, sadly his procedure was canceled that morning g due to the anesthesiologist uncomfortable with a couple things that now have to be worked through before proceeding. So they are going to get a shock when I have to close again for those couple days

[Annalee]

Thank you I'm glad I'm not the only one. I do t see developing any long term relationships anymore like the past. My husband is doing ok, sadly his procedure was canceled that morning g due to the anesthesiologist uncomfortable with a couple things that now have to be worked through before proceeding. So they are going to get a shock when I have to close again for those couple days

Hope the procedure goes well! And remember YOU are NOT the one that has become UNKIND; it is THEM. You are operating with the same rules and expectations. My mom is constantly reminding me that the CLIENTS are making the bad choices not US; CLIENTS KNOW the rules and they KNOW the consequences of NOT following those rules...and the rules are NON-NEGOTIABLE! But I do understand, it still hurts because most Family child care people I know are very passionate about their businesses and are givers but we are near the give-out/burn-out point! Best wishes to you!

[TenderHearts]

Thank you! I try to remember that and it's the kids that i just adore and the stuff I do is for them. Its just so frustrating the time and effort I put into doing things for the Families to only feel so unappreciated. I spent a weekend making a coaster for them with their photos, took time to do 6 to only have the mom not even say anything after I handed it to her after I said I'll give this to you its breakable and then hands it to her son because he wanted it, well it didn't even leave my driveway in one piece. I know its not thw right attitude but it truly makes me want ro do something else but I do love the kids and it's not their fault.

[Annalee]

Bless you! I understand completely! FYI....some tips mom and I have implemented this year.

*Very few crafts....period!

*No parties.....a simple snack/activity planned with NO sign-up sheet for parents to bring or do anything.....that used to work but not anymore....clients sign up for things and don't bring them/fuss about what's been asked for them to bring/etc.

*Text the newsletters; stop reminding them ALL THE TIME....not my fault if they don't READ what I give them...no more telling...just open/close....let them show up if they want....the door is locked and they can't get in.

*Do what I need to do regarding sickness/covid/ or any other open/close issue...just do it! Don't say I'm sorry; just do it! When they respond with a WHAT? just look at them with your eyes speaking. Clients can't argue with silence.

*DO NOT answer every text/call/email.....let them wait for it! Some concerns/questions lead to a nonsensical discussion; just don't bite on their conversation.

Any one else got some tidbits they would like to add to this list.

I think we could all use some helpful ways to 'survive' in this business!

[Snowmom]

I think the last couple years have been really hard on even the most compassionate of people. There's a lot of anger, reactive emotions, and general sense of constant burnout in everyone due to the state of the world.

I have always tried to remain strictly business, so this doesn't exactly bother me. But the clients that ARE caring... I can tell you that they get a lot MORE of me. More leeway, more time & communication, just more!
The ones that don't put in extra effort- they get the basic package.

But when it comes to illnesses, if they weren't communicating the situation with me, I would tell them they either need to be honest or find another caregiver. I won't put up with that.


I hope things improve for you and your husband.