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Jealousy

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  • Jealousy

    Good morning! I am hoping for some advice.

    I have a little boy who is almost 1.5, with me since last Aug. He is an only child of first time parents, who are making all the typical first time parent “mistakes.” 😜 He had a horrible separation anxiety for the first 4 to 5 months, to the point where I seriously consider terming. That has gotten much better, except ...

    Any time -and I mean EVERY time- another child gets attention of any sort, or comforted or is getting a hug, etc., he will turn from a happy, smiling kid to running over to me as fast as he can and just breaking down screaming and sobbing in front of me. It’s so bad that my own children avoid getting any hugs or snuggles in the morning because I don’t want to hear the screaming and crying before they go to school.

    This is gone on for months. I have tried ignoring it. I have tried reassuring him. I have even tried including him by patting his back or touching his hand if I’m completing another child. Nothing seems to be working. Other parents have commented about it. I have jokingly told the parents that he desperately needs a sibling, and just found out that they are expecting late this year! Good luck to them😬

    Any other ideas?

  • #2
    Active ignore. It is the only thing that will work. If he gets no reward for it, he will find another way to. "Go play toys, DCB. I will be right back." then turn your back. Let him learn to seek the attention of his peers, instead. Our role is supervisory, the relationships are between the kids.

    As far as meeting your own kids needs, I would fix that, because that is within your power, now. If I could not delay his drop off until after my kids left for the day, DCB would go behind a gate (safe area with toys) and I would go into the next room with my kids to say my goodbyes. Even if it is only behind an opened door, in the bathroom or a pantry... I would make it a funny thing that the kids will talk about later. "Remember when mom had that screamer kid and we hid in the pantry eating chocolate before the bus came? That was so funny!"
    Last edited by Cat Herder; 05-13-2021, 07:56 AM.

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