Creepy EX Daycare Dad/Neighbor

[Valerie928]

I posted on the old forum about this daycare family I had. The back story is when covid hit back in March 2020, I went down to part time care. My families all understood, they too were being sent home to work ect. All families understood except 1. This family had 1 child and didn't want to parent. This child came to my home m-f. Both of them were mostly working from home and came to accept and partake in my part time care. Fast forward to June 2020, I offer back full time care as businesses were opening back ect. THAT family, the ones who hate parenting declined my full time offer. Certainly strange since they don't want to parent. SO, I said "oh why". The dad tells me they are looking into a center. I said oh NO! If you choose center, I won't provide childcare for you period. My own kids were not allowed to attend school, NOWAY I was taking in a daycare kid during a pandemic that was going to a public daycare some days, here in my home other days. So we carry on with part time.

Fast forward to September when that dcg starts talking about her school! I texted dad and asked if dcg attends daycare on the days she's not here. He said yes. Well, I termed on the spot. They lied and were deceiving. I told them I would not have any part of that arrangement back in June!

Fast forward to present day. That family is my neighbor 3 houses down. ( Yes, I have learned my lesson about providing childcare to neighbors) Anyway, the idiot dad walks their mutt 3-4 times a day past my house, always has. He let's the dog crap and pee in yards along the way, even mine. Lately he has dcg girl with him, walking mutt sometimes. Last week the dad and dcg came to my door! Just the screen door was there shut, the main door open, it was nice out. I can hear the creep telling dcg to knock and call my name. I ignored them. I don't want anything to do with them and it's very obvious as I NEVER wave or say hello when they go by. I carry resentment. Then this past Saturday I am in my backyard with my daughter and I can see idiot and then I see/ hear dcg running along the side of my house calling my name. I ignored again and was annoyed. I sent him a text after I searched his number up as I had long ago deleted it from my phone. I told him/ and kid to not come up to my door or in my yard. I told him I want nothing to with them. Told him I moved on and that's that.

He texted back saying they never did anything wrong and how he was just being neighborly and how I shouldn't ignore his kid.😒

My questions are, is this creepy?

Does he have any right coming on my property and letting his kid run around my yard?

Also , do people have the right to let their dog do their business on your property even if they clean it up? I think it's rude and gross.

Also, that dcg does not care about seeing me. I think It's the creepy dad putting it in her head. She was only 2 1/2 when I termed. I am pretty sure she never really cared.

[Cat Herder]

I would be creeped out and most likely would have sent the text to his wife and him. Group text, every text, even if he texted back privately. His wife should see each and every one.

[Josiegirl]

I'd be interested in his real reasons. I'm thinking just to annoy you, maybe rub it in your face that she goes someplace else and is happy there, IDK. But yeh, ignore ignore ignore. He's using his dd to bother you. :/ He cannot seem to accept the fact that he lied to you and did, in fact, do something wrong. I'm done trying to figure some people out. They're just not worth the effort.

As far as the dog issue, is he picking it up all the time? I guess that part wouldn't bother me as long as he's not singling you out for that and he is picking it up every single time. We have dogs in our neighborhood that are allowed to roam and they, unfortunately, pick my elderly neighbor's yard across the street to do their business. And no intent on picking any of it up. All the time. *That's* not right.

[Valerie928]

I'd be interested in his real reasons. I'm thinking just to annoy you, maybe rub it in your face that she goes someplace else and is happy there, IDK. But yeh, ignore ignore ignore. He's using his dd to bother you. :/ He cannot seem to accept the fact that he lied to you and did, in fact, do something wrong. I'm done trying to figure some people out. They're just not worth the effort.

As far as the dog issue, is he picking it up all the time? I guess that part wouldn't bother me as long as he's not singling you out for that and he is picking it up every single time. We have dogs in our neighborhood that are allowed to roam and they, unfortunately, pick my elderly neighbor's yard across the street to do their business. And no intent on picking any of it up. All the time. *That's* not right.

I just want to be left alone! And you are right. He can't accept his wrongdoing. Hopefully now he'll get the picture

[Jo123abc]

Turn a sprinkler on when you see them coming or expect them to wander through your yard. That pup won't want to poop in the sprinkler. Not a nice oscillating one either... A "ch-ch-ch-chchchch" one 😂 whatever those are called

[Blackcat31]

Next time you see him, yell LOUDLY so neighbors can hear.... "Oh good! You must be here to pick up your dog poop!!"
Then group text him and let him know that if he allows his dog or his child in your yard again, you'll be calling the police.

I will literally chase someone down if they allow their dog to do their business in my yard and not pick it up
I usually have my cell phone in hand and video record them so they know I saw them shirk their pet parent duty and their pets doo-doo.
If you can't tell this is one neighbor behavior that infuriates me.

[Jo123abc]

Yes!! 😂 A lot less passive aggressive than my go-to and much more effective probably

[Alwaysgreener]

Personally, I would never texted him or made any contact, just continued to ignore him, let my DH tell him to get lost.

But CH is right, group text the wife and husband the next time, I may even include my husband if I felt that uncomfortable about ex dcd.

I group text current parents whenever possible. I have one dcd that uses the group text to text when he arrives.

[Cat Herder]

In my past experience, things tend to escalate and I lose credibility if I include my DH in a daycare or neighbor child/family dispute that he was not at the center of to begin with. I want them to fear/respect me, not tattle to my DH, IYKWIM. My aim is every bit as good as his but for some reason people feel including him is a threat, like he is my bodyguard and it should then be handled exclusively by the men. Maybe it is cultural, I don't know. The reality is that I am the biggest threat in this house, Mama Bears don't play. Ha!! I would include his wife as I want her aware he is coming over when my husband is out.

[Alwaysgreener]

I can see your point. I see this exclusively as a neighbor issue because the business relationship has completely ended.

[Valerie928]

Personally, I would never texted him or made any contact, just continued to ignore him, let my DH tell him to get lost.

But CH is right, group text the wife and husband the next time, I may even include my husband if I felt that uncomfortable about ex dcd.

I group text current parents whenever possible. I have one dcd that uses the group text to text when he arrives.

I just feel like they have no business coming up to my door or in my yard. Isn't there a no trespassing thing? Or is that just a sign people put up and really means nothing. I only texted him because I don't want to speak to him in person. If him and or him and his kid come up to my door or whatever again my husband will intervene for sure.

[CactusWren]

I agree with Josie, sounds like he is using DD to annoy you. I too would respond back in a group text, even if he text privately. How frustrating

[Josiegirl]

LOVE the sprinkler idea!!